overreacting or not?

I'm back from my brief blogging break and this post represents a milestone for me - my 100th post!!  How exciting!

Today I'm wondering if you have ever been so frustrated with your other half that you just wanted to hurt them?!  Not literally but you just have all this rage in you that you're dying to get out?  I had a sort of breakdown this afternoon after succumbing to the pressures of the past few weeks and blaming it solely on my husband.  I was sort of feeling like he doesn't support my schooling and that he feels I should do everything I usually do, plus find time to study, write my papers, etc.

Of course, I was just completely overreacting but he really was being a tard.  And this man can be just as stubborn as me.

Although, of course, I always win.

I was frustrated because he hasn't helped me out with Lil J all week (except for Saturday, when he looked after Lil J all day because I took my mom out for a belated Mother's Day celebration.  And even then, I felt guilty for leaving Lil J) and I was trying my hardest to study.  Did I mention I also took a two day course at a local university for executive education?  The course was during work hours but it completely drained me by the time I got home and, therefore, I wasn't able to study for my regular class.

So I asked my husband if he could help out with Lil J today.  He sleeps in until close to noon.  Then spends an hour in the washroom and then announces that he's going to go see a movie.  Ummmm, excuse me?  My paper and discussions are due today.  I haven't even finished reading the text yet.  And Lil J is super clingy to me.  What am I supposed to do? 

So while the hubby is in the washroom for the second time of the day, I attempt to put Lil J down for a nap for about 40 minutes.  Nothing works.  He's fighting sleep.  Of course!

I start bawling my eyes out and Lil J is looking at me like I'm crazy.  I can't stop crying as I "hear" my husband leave for the movies.  I am completely stressing about how I'm going to get my assignment done.  Almost hyperventilating.

Then I decide that if Lil J isn't going to sleep in my bed, he's going to his crib.  Which he hates.  I go to his room to put him in the crib and find that his sheets are in the wash.  Completely forgot.  I go to get fresh sheets and Lil J runs off and screams, "Daddy!!".  I thought he was being delusional because Daddy was at the movies.

Turns out Daddy is on the couch and playing with Lil J.  Silence is the key now and I quietly slip into the kitchen to work on my homework.  Everything is normal and my husband probably has no idea I had a breakdown.  Let's keep it that way. 

In the end I was able to read the remaining 10-15 pages out of 33 pages of contract law and write my paper and submit my discussion answers.  God bless my instructor for making our writing assignments a lot easier than the first few weeks.

So was I overreacting?  Was the past few weeks just so stressful for me that I just was at the end of the road?  Crying sure helped me get it all out and I feel 100% better now.  What would you do in this situation?

- swank|mama

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